Hope for the Future

I am often disillusioned with young people. Their manners, their clothes, their personal behavior – all have given plenty of opportunity to worry about the future of our world. I have since learned to look past tattoos and clothes. I have been surrounded by many of the younger generation sporting the weird clothes and plenty of ink and discovered that they can be polite, bright and hard working. However, there are others out there who are clueless to the every day courtesies and respect that my generation was trained to be aware of.

Classic example: A family sitting on the benches in a local cafeteria waiting for the long line to wind down. I entered with my elderly mother walking with the aid of a cane. Not a one of the adults got up to offer a seat, nor did they tell their children to get up and make space. I had to approach a young man and ask if he would be so kind as to give his seat to a lady who could not stand very long. He complied, but the notion to defer to someone who looked like they had difficulty standing wasn’t an auto-response ingrained in his brain.

If someone signals they need to get in my lane on our crazy freeways, I slow down and let them over. I can’t tell you how many times I have signaled and tapped my brakes to indicate I need to merge, only to miss my exit or get forced into a dangerous situation. I don’t care what color someone is – if they are elderly they need to go ahead of me or have my seat. I have pulled over and handed people at bus stops my only umbrella. Umbrellas are cheap and are found in almost every store one can walk into.

My best yard-stick for the personality of many of our youth is my contact with those who work in the food service industry. Some are just working because they need a job for spending-money. Some work to pay for school. Some work to support themselves and family. By and large they are polite, but I find that many are doing their jobs on auto pilot and doing only what is necessary to stay employed while managing to spend more time visiting with their working cohorts and playing with their phone.

A typical experience:

Waiter: May I take your drink order?

Me: I would like a water, a drink and some extra paper napkins.

Ten minutes go by and the drink arrives. It is usually delivered by a runner, not the waiter. The drink is not correct. The lime is missing. They made it tall when I ordered a rocks glass. Clearly, the specifics of my order were not noted on a piece of paper. My words “I ordered a water first.” are lost on the runner. The waiter returns to see if we are ready to order the meal. By this time I have eaten enough chips or peanuts to choke a hippopotamus. I am parched. My words to the waiter of, “I ordered a water first. And extra napkins.” Their reply comes out almost as if I am being snippy with them, maybe even hinting that I never ordered the water in the first place. “I’ll get that right out.” is usually their reply. In the meantime, dinner is ordered.

The water does not arrive. Dinner is served and, again, I ask for water. “Oh, yes. I’ll get that right out.” is heard again. They are simply clueless or just not paying attention. They certainly are not writing down details. And the devil is in the details.

I am not saying this happens in every restaurant. By and large wait staff are pretty good, just not paying enough attention to detail as expected by someone who is a person who does pay attention to detail. When I stumble on a server who gets it right the first time, I try to ask to sit in their station every time. I will even dine only on the nights they are assigned to work, just to avoid the kids who might write down your drink, but water and napkins are not written down, maybe because they think, in that fleeting nano second, they will remember those two items.

Hence forth comes the story of Anna, a waitress at a local steakhouse chain. The first time she waited on us, she asked me to wait for her to get her pad open so she could write everything down. She even said, “I don’t want to forget anything.” The first item she wrote was water, then paper napkins, then the drinks. I am specific about the drink. She wrote everything down and repeated the order, explaining that, since she didn’t fully understand some bar jargon, she wanted to be certain it was correct. The water and napkins arrived as soon as she turned in the drink orders. The drink arrived in perfect order. She delivered it herself so she could question the bar tender to make sure it was done as ordered. The one time the drink was delivered by a runner, Anna was upset. It prevented her from ensuring it was made as ordered, and, of course, it wasn’t. She took it back immediately with profuse apologies.

After only a couple of trips, Anna quickly took up our routine and was ready for us almost before we settled in our seats. Brief conversations allowed us to get to know her better. She asked questions about us and slowly learned our personalities and things going on in our daily life.

Now, who would expect someone less than half our age to be interested in two old people? I will certainly have no impact on her future. I will have no input in her daily life. I will have no influence on her family and friends. But I do hope, years from now, she will remember an old lady who was quirky and funny. I also hope she will remember how we treated her and pay it forward to a young person in her life's future. My other hope, even though I know she is studying for another career, is that she might stay in the service industry to teach others. I believe she could be management. I believe she could be a game changer. I am sure she will enrich the lives of others, young and old. I am certain she will be successful at whatever she chooses to do. She knows the devil is in the details, and she makes certain she has those details under control.

While others are going in circles, Anna is drawing a map with all the right circles and arrows to get her where she is going. That steakhouse is lucky to have someone of Anna’s caliber.

She is also a prime example of the fact that there are always those exceptions to the rules. She is a blonde. The jokes simply do not apply.